Day 1-4: A blur.

A total and complete blur.  In fact today is the first day I have felt as though I actually enjoy living in Stockholm.  The past few days have certainly been a struggle.   I didn’t have anything nice to say, so I skipped the blog entirely.  Certainly a Swedish mob would have shown up at my doorstep had I penned my thoughts at the time.  There is some interesting reading though, so please, read on.

 When we visited Stockholm last summer the locals could not have been nicer to us.  Ultra helpful and so kind.  It pays to be a tourist in this city.  Becoming a resident is a whole different ballgame.  We arrived on Thursday morning.  The flight was uneventful but lacked the abundance of sleep that I needed.  I should have realized that the sleep deprivation was clouding my thought process and should not have left the house at all on Thursday.  But you know me.  Always have to get things done immediately, if not sooner.  I decided that dropping off the bags in our apartment, not passing go, and going directly to the grocery store would be a good idea.  Grocery store.  Yeah.  Try looking for skim milk and margarine in the sea of 500 different types of spread IN SWEDISH (apparently different types of butter are big here – like butter with rapeseed oil.  Who knew?)   THEY said learning Swedish wasn’t necessary.  I think nej (HEY…that’s no in Swedish, so maybe I am learning). 

We do need to learn. 

 I made chocolate pudding (Chokladpudding) tonight for dessert.  Here are the instructions (sans oomlats and other random circles over letters that I do not have on my computer): 

Gor sa har:  Vispa ner pasarnas innehalkl i 5 dl valfri (pastoriserad) sval mjolk (en pase till 2,5 dl).  Ror om nagon minut och hall darefter genast upp i serveringsskal eller coupeglas.  Lat sta kallt 10-15 minuter. 

It’s a good thing I’ve made pudding before.  Also a good thing for this site.

We need to learn.

 Friday we slept until noon (6 AM EST).  We had to get to the Tax Office .  Anyone who lives in Sweden for more than three months needs to register at the tax office.  If you are going to stay one year or more you will get a personnummer.  This is the number that allows you to do things like get a cell phone, get some additional TV stations from the cable company, and get a bank account.  There are surely other things to which we are not yet privvy(and will not ever be since we are with most certainty not going to be assigned a personnummer).  We got to the office, which is on Sodermalm, the island south of Stockholm,  and got on queue (kind of as you would do at the deli at Meijer—take a number–we were told this queuing was “Swedish custom”).  So we took our number.  And waited.  And waited.  And waited……………….And waited.   Until our number was called. #404, no response.  #405, no response.  #406, no response, and finally #407, NO RESPONSE.  408!!! They called it!!  But before we got to the window,  #407 with a very large butt, very large attitude, and very fake blonde hair arrived (attitude and butt not large enough to show up when her ACTUAL number was called–hair would have arrived first no doubt).  Problem is, clerk behind the counter already hit 408 on the automatic counter, meaning that she was now helping bigbuttfakeblonde#407 and the NEXT number called would be #409 and we were SOL!!! (shit out of luck for those of you who don’t know). So then we had to fight our way to get a clerk to help us or take a NEW number and wait yet AGAIN.  So on my advice we fought.  In English.  Probably not the best move.  But snippy big butt #407 got my Irish up.  There was a large man behind us chuckling “valkommen till Stockholm” (translation: welcome to Stockholm.  And there are oomlats over the ’A’ and maybe even the ’I'…..I gotta get me some oomlats!)  So you are chuckling and you understand our plight large man, HELP US DAMMIT!  But no.  Large man watched.   And laughed.  Finally the clerk who dissed us for large ass #407 deigned to accept us in her line, and proceeded to tell us that we need a birth certificate for The Bug and a marriage license for me and Mr. T.  WHAT???  WHY?????  We presented these dox to get our passports issued by the United States of America.  COME ON!  I had to give the marriage license to get MY passport in OUR last name.   The Bug could not even get a passport without her birth certificate and both parents present to vouch for the fact that she was actually born.  She.  Was.  Actually.  Born.   It’s VERY clear that we’ve already presented the documentation.  And more to the point, why would I ever bring these things to Sweden?  And how the f*&^ am I supposed to get them now that I am here?   To any mom reading this, please be assured that this is the time when potty mouth is well deserved.  I am sorry.   Every time Mr. T. and I see the word “nummer” our hearts sink.  Like when we went next to IKEA after leaving the ridiculous tax office, and The Bug wanted to be dropped off in the kid area (Barnrum or something in Swedish).  We saw something with nummer on the form to drop her off and we wanted to run screaming through the door.  Actually they only wanted the “nummer” of the cubby in which she put her coat and boots, but we thought for some reason we needed the dreaded personnummer to drop her off at IKEA.  

And this brings you through our first and (hopefully) most frustrating 24 hours in Sweden.  I’m really too tired to go into more, but hopefully tomorrow I’ll be able to bring you up to present.  And perhaps a few pictures which I did take on my new cell phone (yes, we have figured out how to get around the personnummer requirement for cell phone but as for getting Sponge Bob on TV, I would venture to guess no.   A very sad time for me, Mr. T. and especially The Bug).

Anyone who may be reading from Sweden, please advise any ideas reagarding the personnummer.  I can’t believe it should be this difficult or unfriendly to settle temporary residence for 1 year in your country.  We are not even looking for any sort of tax benefit as we are not being paid here.  In addition, our medical bills are still being paid by our comprehensive insurance in the USA.  We’re not looking to take anything from you.  All we want is some cable TV…….you know, a little Sponge Bob on Nickelodeon, for which we are more than willing to pay.  Even at a premium.  It is a shame that it is so difficult.

 Waaaaaaaa!!!!

~ by feefour on January 13, 2008.